Sex on a Plate


Sex on a Plate - Luscious London Broil IIWhen Beyoncé wrote the lyrics for her #1 hit, “Bootilicious”, I’m not so sure that, even in her wildest imagination, she intended for the term to mean “Sex on a Plate”, as it does for Sharon Esther Lampert.  Sharon is the author of this cookbook of everlasting love.  Today at Café L’Amour, the aphrodisiac test kitchen, I am preparing “Luscious London Broil with Bootilicious Cherry-Balsamic Infusion”.  It’s one of Sharon’s food foreplay recipes.  She reminds me of myself in many ways.  She describes herself as a poet, philosopher, pin-up, a prophet and even a tribal princess of Israel.  I relate to at least the first four, yet none of her significators describe her as a gourmet, a chef or even a home cook.  I might add that I am a gourmet sexpert and that the cherry-balsamic infusion made my toes curl because it’s so good.  Why wouldn’t she claim her culinary position?  She is clearly a seductress in the kitchen.  Allow me to quote one of Sharon’s poems that shed some light on this discrepancy.  The poem is titled, “No, I Don’t Cook.”:

A Man Has Never Come to My Home

Expecting Me to Cook Dinner;

Every Man Who Comes to My Home

Expects to Have Me for Dinner

 Weeeerk, Sharon!  I guess this ties all three of us together.  Beyoncé, Sharon and I each understand the fact that bootiliciousness ignites the most primitive urge we have, whether it be on a plate or in a bed.

Serving your sexual appetite,

Honey L’Amour

RECIPE

 Luscious London Broil

Served with “bootilicious cherry-balsamic infusion” from the “Sex on a Plate” cookbook and accompanied by country potatoes with haricot verts and wild mushrooms, a glass of cabernet sauvignon and a chocolate filled cannoli for dessert makes this a complete seduction supper.

INGREDIENTS

  • ½ cup dry red wine (I used a cabernet sauvignon – La Playa)
  • ¼ cup balsamic vinegar
  • 2 tablespoons cherry preserves, + 1 tablespoon (+ one my addition)
  • 3 tablespoons shallots, finely chopped
  • 2 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1 teaspoon extra-virgin olive oil
  • ½ teaspoon salt
  • ½ teaspoon garlic powder (my addition)
  • ½ teaspoon onion powder (my addition)
  • 2 teaspoons butter (I used 1 tablespoon, it’s the French in me)

Prepare Bootilicious Cherry-Balsamic Infusion (Marinade):

Mix wine, vinegar, cherry preserves, garlic, shallot, salt and pepper in a small bowl

Prepare to Marinate London Broil:

  • Place meat in a shallow glass dish
  • Pour marinade over the meat and turn to coat
  • Cover and marinate in the refrigerator, turn several times (up to 8-hours)
  • Bring the marinade to a boil and reduce to a 1/2 cup, add additional cherry preserves
  • add butter, and whisk until melted, remove from heat

Prepare to Cook London Broil:

  • Brush a cast-iron skillet will oil and pre-heat
  • Add the meat and cook for 6 minutes per side (meat form a crust, do not overcook!)
  • Transfer the meat to a cutting board and rest for 5-minutes
  • Slice meat thinly against grain
  • Top with cherry-balsamic marinade

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